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dear journal,

i know i haven't written anything to you in a long while.  it's been a hard week and an even worse year.  i hope you don't mind.  i know you won't.  it's just... i feel cold all over.  i stopped bleeding ink when i get hurt.  can you find my heart?  yesterday, i think she drowned in the river.



Dear boy with ice for blood,

Please don't hate me, but I couldn't save her.
It was a Sunday night and I was tired. We struggled near the pier. She was shaking and screaming, she told me it wasn't worth it, she told me you didn't love her anymore. Her hands tasted like fire and her eyes were glaciers, and I sizzled and fell to ash.

I couldn't hold her back. I'm sorry.



dear journal,

don't tell me that! i need to believe that i can wake up and she'll be here. it's all that keeps my blood thawed enough to breathe. i wish.... i don't know. i never know what i want. it's not fair. maybe someday these words will bring her home?

she always did burn too cold to touch.



Dear boy with ice,

She'll be there. Tomorrow, she'll be sleeping on your couch again, mascara in grey rivers down her cheeks. She'll be whispering i love you to your back again. She'll be crying and trying to explain. Tomorrow, your imagination will give you a second chance and this time you have to do things right.

This time, you have to listen.



dear journal

you were right. i woke up and she was here. but i was neither hear nor their. i tried. i really did. but she wasn't speaking and i think i've gone deaf. i can't even hear her beat away. everything is so... silent.

i never meant to hurt her like this.



Dear boy,

You can't let the memories go. You have to hold on to them. If you keep on thinking about it, if you replay that scene in your head again and again until the thought of her makes you ache, then someday things will change. Someday, maybe it will make you love her again.

Someday, it will bring her back.
a much-delayed collab with =platinummyr, which has unfortunately been on hold for a while because of everything that's been happening in my life lately...things have been trying.

if you fave this please fave his here

comments welcome :heart:
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:iconplatinummyr:
platinummyr Featured By Owner Dec 14, 2009  Hobbyist Writer
:heart: It was ohsomuchfun working with you :love:
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:icononeofthose-rachels:
oneofthose-rachels Featured By Owner Dec 16, 2009
ohyesitwas :heart:
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:iconplatinummyr:
platinummyr Featured By Owner Dec 16, 2009  Hobbyist Writer
:blush:
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:iconetherealdelirium:
etherealdelirium Featured By Owner Nov 28, 2009
This is absolutely beautiful. :heart:
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:icononeofthose-rachels:
oneofthose-rachels Featured By Owner Nov 28, 2009
thank you so much :heart:
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:iconhamletcell:
HamletCell Featured By Owner Nov 28, 2009
this took my breath away. thank you :heart:
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:icononeofthose-rachels:
oneofthose-rachels Featured By Owner Nov 28, 2009
thank you for that awesome comment :heart:
Reply
:iconanemone-the-bored:
Anemone-The-Bored Featured By Owner Nov 27, 2009
Wonderfully written. What an awesome collab. :heart:
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:icononeofthose-rachels:
oneofthose-rachels Featured By Owner Nov 28, 2009
thank you so much :heart:
Reply
:iconxcaroline:
xcaroline Featured By Owner Nov 27, 2009
beautiful collab :heart:
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:icononeofthose-rachels:
oneofthose-rachels Featured By Owner Nov 28, 2009
thank you (:
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:iconxcaroline:
xcaroline Featured By Owner Nov 28, 2009
no problemmmm :]
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:icondontsayiloveyou:
DontSayILoveYou Featured By Owner Nov 27, 2009
my heart hurts reading this. it's beautiful :)
Reply
:icononeofthose-rachels:
oneofthose-rachels Featured By Owner Nov 28, 2009
thanks so very much <3
Reply
:iconalmostlovers:
almostlovers Featured By Owner Nov 27, 2009
oh, this was so beautifully written.
i absolutely adore it. :heart:
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:icononeofthose-rachels:
oneofthose-rachels Featured By Owner Nov 28, 2009
ahh, i absolutely adore that comment. <3
thank you!
Reply
:iconalmostlovers:
almostlovers Featured By Owner Nov 28, 2009
:heart:
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:iconmarmonica:
Marmonica Featured By Owner Nov 27, 2009
This is beautiful.
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:icononeofthose-rachels:
oneofthose-rachels Featured By Owner Nov 28, 2009
thank you so much! (:
Reply
:iconamaya16:
Amaya16 Featured By Owner Nov 27, 2009
:heart:

makes my heart ache and my eyes sting.
Reply
:icononeofthose-rachels:
oneofthose-rachels Featured By Owner Nov 28, 2009
oh no :hug: don't be sad
your comments make me happy, so that just wouldn't be fair.

:heart:
Reply
:iconamaya16:
Amaya16 Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2009
but but... that's the truth. it's wonderful.

everything your write is amazing :glomp:
Reply
:iconnelly69:
Nelly69 Featured By Owner Nov 27, 2009
wow..that was soo confronting but written soo good :D
Reply
:icononeofthose-rachels:
oneofthose-rachels Featured By Owner Nov 27, 2009
thank you so much :heart:
Reply
:iconnelly69:
Nelly69 Featured By Owner Nov 27, 2009
thats ok... its worth the fav :D
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